Trophies and Liverpool FC used to be like television's Ant and Dec - you never saw one without the other. In recent years, however, in order for this somewhat strained analogy to work, the two Geordie chuckle goblins would have to be tragically separated in the jungle because the Anfield club is no longer synonymous with...
In a world where Latest News woke blearily to jauntily separatist tweets from the actual President of the United States about a regrettable building project, it is fair to say that any upbeat revelations would be most eagerly embraced. How serendipitous then, that the next story we encountered was the official announcement of Phillipe...
Nobody likes a crisis meeting. The clue, you see, is in the name. The trepidation and angst before, the recriminations during and the fallout after such gatherings, all combine to make the experience pretty unpleasant. However, quite often that very unpleasantness is absolutely necessary. The nettle must be grasped, the bull grabbed by the...
If you're reading this then you've gotten past the irritation with the immediate past long enough to contemplate the future, and for that, I thank you. The life of the daily columnist is a lonely one and the comfort of your virtual presence warms the cold dying heart of Latest News just enough to brave...
As we've all uneasily borne witness to the declining form and results of the Reds, the inclination of many has been to engage in the inevitable search for blame. People love to blame, don't they? It's an ugly trait but a common one. The aftermath of Saturday's embarrassing defeat was a veritable jamboree of...
Hello, good evening and welcome to a brief and final Latest News, of the week, where absolutely nothing is wrong. What could be wrong? That television? It was always broken, what of it? Yes, that computer monitor too. The radio too, yeah. What are you implying? Everything's fine. WE SAID IT'S FINE.
Football is supposed to...
Today, as the people of the United States prepare for the inauguration of a dangerously unhinged vulgarian and the good folk of Britain brace themselves before going through an exit door marked 'Are You Absolutely Sure?' the rest of the world seems to be increasingly riven by conflict and chaos. 2017: it's going great.
Amidst...
You know that feeling when you really want to watch the Redmen but you really don't want to watch the Redmen? Here at Latest News, that was the itchy blanket of ambivalence that we snuggled beneath on the sofa and warily changed the channel to BT Sport ahead of last night's cup tie with...
Most of the Liverpool fans I know for certain to be actual corporeal beings don't have a lot of time for Lucas Leiva as a footballer. In stark contrast, those with whom I only have virtual interactions seem to almost uniformly love the amiable Brazilian. As is often the way in the odd life...
For a third successive day, the second of your updates from Latest News concerns the bureaucratic nonsense which is robbing Liverpool Football Club of one of their most valuable on-field assets. As the story unfolded yesterday, there was some hope of a defiant stance from the club, a rumour that Joel Matip would be...
