"Can't believe this; same old story again.",
Cried from the crowd before Jon Walter's pen,
"He's goin' to score, this season is shit,
'Look at the bald Evertonian tit."
"Come on Simon, let us see what you're worth!
'Prove to us Reds that you're made for the shirt,"
The crowd became tense, and the scene was set,
Arses in ribbons, heads...
It’s August 2009 Liverpool travel down to White Hart Lane for the opening game of the Premier League season. Xabi Alonso, Sami Hyypia and Alvaro Arbeloa had all departed Merseyside for pastures new and in came Alberto Aquilani, Glen Johnson and Sotirios Kyrgiakos. Expectation was high after strong previous season with many expecting Liverpool...
The Premier League's popularity is soaring in the United States, where viewers are developing a deep connection with football (or "soccer") as cable providers afford people access to nearly every match. As American fans select teams to follow by the millions, the ongoing fight between top clubs to capture their rabid support is a...
Doubters.
Something Brendan Rodgers has had to deal with throughout his brief period as Liverpool manager. Whether it be his credentials, his methods, his transfer signings, his bosses, or his vocabulary, there is nothing that has escaped the manager from ridicule.
With particular regards to transfers, fans have spoken themselves to death in discussing who to...
Daniel Sturridge was a promising youngster at Manchester City when he first made his name. He didn’t manage to fulfil his potential as he never really got to play in his desired position or some could argue his attitude was not right. Sturridge just wasn’t cutting it at Manchester City even though it was...
Gerrard is the reason we’re conceding so many goals… No, Johnson is the reason we’re conceding so many goals… No, Agger is the issue… Nope, it’s definitely Jon Flanagan’s fault… It’s definitely Kolo Toure being useless isn’t it. That’s the reason…
Just listen to yourselves for a moment. Liverpool won a seven goal thriller to...
Are you with me? We are 12 league games away from something remarkable.
The door to the riches of the Champions League is firmly open to us, it’s beckoning us in like the hostess of our favourite bar or nightclub. We would be foolish not to take up the offer, after all, who knows when...
Whilst I appreciate that the title may be somewhat provocative if you look through the current Liverpool team, you will see many players who, at one point or another have been classed as rejects. In fact, from the team that played Fulham in the last Barclays Premier League game then there are only 3...
I have a stat for you…
Liverpool, compared with the league table at the same stage in 2008/9, are actually closer to the top of the Premier League now than in that magnificent season.
Cast your mind back to 08/09. It was, we thought, the time when most thought Liverpool would once again ascend to the...
Please note that this is a satirical short story, please read it with that in mind.
“Seventy seven quid.”
Gareth stared blankly at his train ticket lying in front of him, taunting him as he scanned the price over and over until it blurred into one blotch of ink.
Lime Street return to Euston Station. Gareth knew...